All posts in category Body Image

Imagine My Surprise

One of the things I promised myself after I had Lucy was that I wouldn’t step foot on the scale until I was at least 3 weeks postpartum.  When I had Hanna (my first child, for any new readers) I had lost all the baby weight and then some when I went in for my 6 week appointment.  I tipped the scales at 296 at 40 weeks, and weighed 266 post-birth.  I could not have been more ecstatic.

I don’t know about any of you other mom’s out there, but it was really hard for me to not get on a scale right after I had Lucy (my saving grace was that my scale broke the week before I had my c-section, which was quite disheartening at the time, if you can imagine).  The last time I weighed myself I weighed 294 and still had two more weeks until my due date.

I really thought that I had gotten lucky my first pregnancy and was going to have to get use to some lingering poundage this time around.

Imagine my surprise when I got on the scale today and it read 263.6!  My weight when I started this pregnancy was 264 and I’m pretty sure that at the end my weight would have come in somewhere around 296 just like last time.

The only issue I had with my first postpartum was that I gained about 18 pounds from breast-feeding.  I was so stressed about whether Hanna was getting enough to eat I just started taking in calories to see if it would help me get my milk supply up.  Little did I know that Hanna was just a small baby and didn’t like to eat that much (she is still that way).  This go around I am not stressing out and I am mostly using my breast pump so I know how much Lucy is eating, and I don’t get so frustrated like last time (Lucy is a hungry little thing, and will out weigh Hanna in no time).

One thing I did do this time is lots of research on how to keep my supply up without taking in empty calories.  I found out some great information and it turns out the more fruits, vegetables, and lean protein you eat the better your milk comes in.  I can attest to that since my eating the last couple of days has been less than stellar.  I have been tracking all of my food through my Weight Watchers account but plants have been seriously lacking.  Pumping today was lower than it has been this past week when I had been getting in plenty of F&V’s.

My goal is to not gain any weight (obviously) and stick to my Weight Watchers goal of  54 points per day.  BTW, nursing mom’s get a crap-ton of points which makes it easy to stay on track.  I almost fear for when I’m not nursing and it drops significantly.

The hardest part is that I am not in the habit of tracking my food anymore and it is going to take me a while to make it a daily thing.  Also, my weight may only be up 11 pounds from my lowest recorded weight, but I am jelly everywhere (that’s what no weight lifting for 10 months will do to you).  None of my clothes fit, and my stomach is crazy stretched out.

But that’s what having a baby does to you.   And I am only 3 weeks out from my c-section, could be worse.

3 Comments
by Shrinking Carrie on April 29, 2013  •  Permalink
Posted in Body Image, Breast Feeding, Family, Goals, Nutrition, Parenting, Postpartum, Pregnancy, Weight Watchers

Posted by Shrinking Carrie on April 29, 2013

http://shrinkingcarrie.com/2013/04/29/imagine-my-surprise/

Being Friendly Counts, Don’t be a Poser

On the last day of my trip to Utah I had breakfast with my Dad, brother, and SIL at the Downtown Cheesecake Factory in the brand spanking new City Creek Mall.  The mall was GORGEOUS, but unfortunately it was closed on Sunday.  We parked in the wrong parking lot, and because the mall spans two city blocks (maybe even more?) we got locked out of the entrance that we had gone through to get there.

There was a mall ranger (he seriously looked like a park ranger, but it was for the mall) that I exchanged a few words with, wondering why it had been open just an hour before.  Afterwards my dad asked me if I knew the man I had been talking with, and I said “no, should I?”, he said that I had talked to him like he was a friendly acquaintance, as if I knew him.

I have always made it a point to be friendly, especially since I have a face that seems to scowl when I don’t mean too.  I try to overcompensate for my rough exterior, but lately it seems to come a lot easier than it use to.  I guess losing 30 pounds will do that for a person.

I noticed this same thing happen at a previous incident when I bought my new Vibram’s:

When I bought these I had to go to a store called 26.2 as they were the only store that I new of locally that carried them.  A runners shop?  I was more than intimidated that these people would give me one look and not help me, or wonder what the heck I was doing in a store that was for running.  I clearly was no runner.

I put on my most friendly face and asked them if they sold the Vibram brand and if I could try some on to see how they felt on my feet.  The guy behind the counter (who looked like he wasn’t a day over 22), was very friendly and we even had a great conversation going back and forth.  I made sure that he knew I would be wearing these for weight lifting and light cardio, as if he needed an explanation for my purchase.  The two salespeople there were very friendly, and I have no idea why I was so insecure about what they may think of me.

They had some punch cards you could use, and when you spent over a certain amount of money you got free things like a water bottle.  We had spent enough to get a sticker.  The stickers were decals for your care and they said 26.2, & 13.1.  While I realize that they are advertising their shop I declined a sticker, and told them bluntly “I have not run these miles and I don’t want to look like a poser.  But one day I will be back for that sticker when it’s the truth.”

I think of all of the things that I have held myself back from trying and doing because I have been overweight.  There should be a big fat finger in my face wagging and someone saying “shame on you for thinking everyone is looking at you a certain way”.  It turns out it was me judging them and not the other way around.

Can you relate to these stories?  

4 Comments
by Shrinking Carrie on May 8, 2012  •  Permalink
Posted in Body Image, Fear

Posted by Shrinking Carrie on May 8, 2012

http://shrinkingcarrie.com/2012/05/08/being-friendly-counts-dont-be-a-poser/

Dirty Four Letter Word, Diet of Forgiveness.

I don’t know how many people are following my perfection challenges that I post at night (if you’re not that’s fine, I use it for an accountability tool for myself, and only post a few remarks with it), but I didn’t post last night.  I fell off the wagon and I fell hard.  I had a great day until I went to the grocery store……hungry.  Those strategically place candy bars at the check out got to me and I gobbled up a Kit Kat before you could even say Trick-or-Treat.  I had planned on making pizza (because I thought I could handle 2 pieces with a salad), and then ate toppings as I made it (doh!).   I quit tracking after I lost count of how many pieces of pepperoni slipped into my mouth.

I am good today, and I have a secret  as to why.  We all know that there is dirty four letter word out there that can trick our minds into feeling deprived and hungry…DIET.  I am doing Weight Watchers, but by no means am I on a DIET.  I am doing a lifestyle change and I am happy to say that this is the longest healthy lifestyle change that I have stuck with (go me!).  But the real changes started when I tried a new kind of diet.  The Forgive Yourself Diet.

It doesn’t require points, pricey foods, or even a gym membership.  All it requires is that you forgive yourself for your own actions.  I think that I got into a habit of negative self-talk and it over took my attempts at making a better life for myself.  Last year, if I would have eaten a candy bar while I was trying to lose weight I would have gone off the deep end with negativity, and put myself in a “woes me” mood.  I would feel sorry for myself and confirm all of the self-doubt that I constantly thought.  The only way I can make a change is by forgiving myself, and saying its ok that I had a weak moment, but that doesn’t mean that I have to give it all up!

Yes, I am only 1/4 of the way through my journey right now, but I know that this different way of thinking has helped me be realistic with my goal setting, and has kept me on track (most days).  One set-back is not the end of the world, and is by no means an excuse to beat myself up, and quit.  I am worth these changes I am making in my life and my family is worth it!

How do you use positive self-talk to influence yourself in daily life?

3 Comments
by Shrinking Carrie on October 22, 2011  •  Permalink
Posted in About Me, Body Image, Diet, Motivation, Positive Self-Talk

Posted by Shrinking Carrie on October 22, 2011

http://shrinkingcarrie.com/2011/10/22/dirty-four-letter-word-diet-of-forgiveness/

NROLFW Phase 2 Re-cap

Sweat it Out:
Elliptical 1 Hour

I feel like I have been so busy lately that I haven’t had a chance to do my phase 2 recap of “New Rules of lifting for Women.  This phase was definitely harder that Phase 1, but that’s the point so I went with it.

Pro’s

  • It had some great interval circuits, and I got sweatier than I usually do on the cardio machines.
  • It was leg heavy, which is where I need to gain muscle if I want to eventually start running.
  • I felt sore after EVERY workout.  Usually my body adapts to the exercise and I don’t feel the burn anymore.
  • I figured out my own little ab routine which I am using still in Phase 3.  I am feeling it way more than the exercises they want you to do.
  • My legs feel MUCH stronger than when I started and I think I am getting down the form for split squats finally.
Con’s  (These cons are me specific and nothing with the program)
  • I didn’t move up weight in any of the leg workout’s, only the arm exercises.
  • The ab exercises are dumb.  I can’t figure out if I’m just doing them wrong, or if they are really that easy.  My stomach is one of the main problem areas, so I really want a GOOD workout for those muscles.  Finally, I had to just come up with my own routine that I am liking much better.
  • I HATE split squats.  Especially the Bulgarian Split squat.  I felt like it took me forever to learn the correct form, and it feels awkward.
  • 2 set of 10 didn’t feel like enough.  I know that you are supposed to increase the weight until you feel the burn by the time you get to 10, but I feel like I couldn’t do more weight without losing form, or hurting something.
  • I feel like I didn’t use the time in this phase wisely.  I messed it up by having a few days of bad eating and I don’t think that my measurements are going to be much different from the measurements in September, even though I feel like I worked HARD.
Here is where I ended the Phase weight Wise:
Workout A
  • Front Squat/Push Press: started with 30 pounds 2 set of 10.  Finished with 30 pounds 3 sets of 10
  • Step-up: Started with 40 pounds 2 set of 10, finished with 22 pound bar 3 sets of 10.  After doing 40 pounds my back started hurting and my form was suffering so I dropped some weight and added a set of 10 reps.  I still felt it working, and didn’t hurt anything.
  • Dumbell One-point Row:  Started with 30 pounds 2 sets of 10.  Finished with 30 Pounds 3 set of 10
  • Static Lunge-rear foot Elevated:  Started with 30 Pounds 2 sets of 10.  Finished with 22 pound bar 3 sets of 10
  • Push-up: 3 sets of 10
  • Plank: 3 Sets of 60 second holds modified to knees
  • Cable Horizontal Wood Chop:  Started with 50 pounds 2 set of 10. Finished with 60 pounds 3 sets of 10

Workout B

  •  Wide-grip deadlift from box:  Started with 50 pounds 2 set of 10.  Ended with 60 pounds 3 sets of 10
  • Bulgarian Split Squat;  Started with 25 pound plate 2 sets of 10.  Finished with 25 pound plate 3 sets of 10
  • Underhand-grip lat Pulldown:  Started with 70 Pounds 2 sets of 10.  Finished with 80 Pounds 3 set of 10
  • Reverse Lunge from box with forward reach: Started with 10 pounds 2 sets of 10.  Finished with 16 pounds 3 sets of 10
  • Dumbell prone Cuban Snatch:  Started with 10 pounds 2 sets of 10.  Finished with 16 pounds 3 sets of 10
Now that I have typed it all out, I do see that I did make quite a bit of progress through this phase.  I think that lately I have been too hard on myself and it seems to help when I actually breakdown my progress.  I could probably do this same method with my eating.  I know that I have made some big strides these last few months and I need to give myself credit for that without thinking I can “reward myself” because of it.
I will be getting out a Phase 3 breakdown once I get the time to sit down and do it.  Until then, happy exercising!
Have you underestimated the progress you’ve made in something? What makes you realize it?
6 Comments
by Shrinking Carrie on October 4, 2011  •  Permalink
Posted in Body Image, Challenges, The New Rules of Lifting for Women

Posted by Shrinking Carrie on October 4, 2011

http://shrinkingcarrie.com/2011/10/04/nrolfw-phase-2-re-cap/

This Day Needs to End Already…..

Sweat it out:
30 minute Elliptical Intervals
30 minute weights Biceps/Triceps

Look who finally made it to the gym today!  This morning Hanna slept in until 8:00 so I decided to go to the gym before her morning nap instead of after.  The hub’s went with me which is nice because I like to have a buddy when I’m lifting weights.  I love to be able to go to the gym before I eat in the morning.  I work out so much better on an empty stomach.

Few things I hate when you haven’t been to the gym in a while:
1. I don’t have the drive nor the stamina to do my regular routine.  30 minutes on the elliptical seemed like forever and was all I could handle.
2. I hate that there are mirrors everywhere, and you can’t escape your sweaty unattractive image.
3. I am hungry ALL DAY LONG afterwards.  Especially if I lift weights.

Few things I love about the gym when you haven’t been in a while:
1. Accomplishment.
2. I’m taking a shower for a reason and not just cause that’s what you do everyday.
3. I love to feel stiff the next day.

I can’t help but feel tested when I go to the gym.  I know its where I should be, but when I see myself in the mirror it doesn’t match the image in my head.  And its frustrating.

I remember reading something about girls with disordered eating.  They put a piece of paper up on the wall and had them trace what they thought they looked like on the paper.  They always drew themselves bigger than they were.

I have the opposite image in my head.  If I was to trace a picture I would make it much smaller than what I am in reality.  I think the reason that I have been in denial about my weight is because in my head I am thin and fit.  Does anybody else have that issue?

It doesn’t help that the full length mirror that is in my bedroom is one of those “thin” mirror’s where the image looks thinner than it is.

Anyway, I’ve been hungry all day and resisting the urge to eat has been tough.  Therefore, this day needs to end already.

Did you workout Today?
Are you way more hungry after a good workout than on rest days?

5 Comments
by Shrinking Carrie on July 20, 2011  •  Permalink
Posted in Body Image

Posted by Shrinking Carrie on July 20, 2011

http://shrinkingcarrie.com/2011/07/20/this-day-needs-to-end-already/

Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 51 other followers